Review: Vixens Gentlemen's Club in Bunker Hill, WV USA

Vixens is an American strip club located near the nation’s capital. For that reason alone you might expect the place to be a standout. After all, what more than a combination of power and money could motivate good trade in a titty bar?

At least that is how things would appear. Of course reality sometimes has a way of uprising us when we take a closer look at the matter. That’s why I have been investigating the adult entertainment industry for a decade. This reporting has taken place all over the world. But all of my findings end up being published here.

So what about Vixens in West Virginia? Unfortunately this place is mediocre at best. The most memorable thing about club is not the ladies on stage. It is the incredibly intrusive entrance procedure that feels more like it belongs at Washington Dulles than a strip club on the side of the road in West Virginia.

Getting into Vixens

Entering Vixens is an exercise in extreme privacy and personal space invasion. The routine here is ridiculous. It is even worse than the previously reviewed Jill’s Gentlemen’s Club in the same state. At that club they only make a copy of each customer’s ID card and write their name in a book. At Vixens they scan each ID card. Then they have each customer pass through a metal detector. Then they follow that up with a full body pat down that any prison guard would be proud of.

I normally don’t mind having my manhood manipulated at an adult venue. Then again it is usually a woman doing the manipulation. Not since the unprovoked shoulder massages in some Thai go go bars have I felt so violated. And that was just to get through the front door. The $5 USD cover charge only added insult to injury.

Strippers, services, prices and summary

There are just a handful of women working at Vixens. To be honest I didn’t expect more. The building exterior looks like any hole-in-the-wall bar that you might find in this part of the world. The interior isn’t much different complete with spoiled beer smells and old televisions hanging on the wall. To be fair it does appear that the owners put some effort into the place. But “some” is about as far as they went.

The dancers at Vixens range in looks from average twenty-somethings to more run down thirty-and-ups with stretch marked beer bellies. I mean no offense to anyone but after all this is a place where people go to watch women dance naked for money.

The ladies do dance here from time to time. Other times they sit around at the bar chatting amongst themselves. Occasionally one or two of the dancers will be more outgoing an actually approach a customer for a dance. I can’t blame them. I wouldn’t want to do their job. Then again I am viewing the place as a customer.

Private dances cost $40 for 5 minutes. That is about the average for US strip clubs these days. At least clubs that are not located in Las Vegas. I prefer the time model to the “per song” pricing found at some places. I know how long 5 minutes lasts. I don’t know how long “a song” is. Are we talking a The Letter or Layla here?

I try my best to look at each place objectively and for what it is. But I can’t help but recognize what else is available in greener pastures. Forty dollars for five minutes of dancing in a place like this rubs me the wrong way. Or maybe that was the bouncer up front. If the women made even a third of the contact that the bouncers working the entrance do the dances might be worth it. Since they don’t I can’t fathom how it would be. So I give this place a half-star. I certainly wouldn’t visit again.